Death Has No More Sting

Once, when Devan was around two, I left him home with my husband while I went to pick up Brena at our church. The church was about two football fields away from my house, so I didn’t have to go far. I had dropped Brena off earlier for Christmas play practice; Devan wasn’t old enough to be needed at a nighttime play practice. When I got back home, Devan would not turn me loose. He wrapped around whatever he could of mine: my waist, my neck, my legs, whatever body part he could grab, he did. Finally, I asked what was going on. He said, “I’m sorry, Mommy, I’m sorry. I poo poo in potty.” Well, I got all excited and ran to the potty. You know how us mamas are. We’re going to praise poop if it comes from our kid. 

So, there was no poop. But Devan just kept clinging to me and saying, “I poo-pooed in the potty, Mommy.” Then, it began to add up. I had left Devan with Tim. Something must have happened while I was gone. I asked Tim what had happened in more specific terms what had he said to Devan. What I learned stopped me in my tracks. While I was gone, Tim changed Devan’s diaper, and he told him that if he didn’t start going to the potty and stop using diapers, Mommy was going to leave and never come back. 

Y’all, I cannot even tell you the amount of stars I saw out of anger. I was so mad at my husband. Granted, I had only gone a minimal distance to the church and back, but something could have happened. I am a disaster, usually looking for somewhere to explode anyway. And, here, my husband told my little boy that if he didn’t use the potty, I was going to leave! If I had been in an accident or something just happened and I had died, Devan would have thought it was all because of the potty issue. I cannot even imagine the trauma he would have had from that. 

Even though Tim’s plan was far from righteous, it did have a righteous accomplishment. Devan started using the big boy potty that night and never looked back. I will have to say that as time went on, I was a little grateful, too, for not having to purchase expensive diapers anymore. I just wished it had happened differently. Thankfully, nothing happened to me that night because if it had, it could have drastically altered future relationships.

Relationships can be damaged easily and are much harder to repair. The simple ways we speak to each other and our actions can cause someone damage. And, sometimes, even our lack of speech and actions can be just as damaging. My post is late this month because I have been helping my husband care for his mom. Unfortunately, she passed this past week. My sister pointed out that she didn’t think my mother-in-law ever spoke a harsh word to me. Come to think of it, she didn’t. We never argued or fussed. I know some folks might wish they could say the same. LOL! I was very blessed with the mother-in-law I had. She raised a wonderful man I call my husband, she helped me raise my children, and she modeled what it meant to love God. 

I seldom remember a time that I ever walked into her kitchen when I didn’t find her sitting at her table reading her Bible. I once bought her a devotion book filled with prayers for her grandchildren. Others said she wouldn’t read it. But I saw her read through it more than once. I enjoyed sipping coffee in the kitchen at the beach while chatting with her. She and I were the only ones who ever added French vanilla cream to our coffee. In the past few years, age caused her to forget the vanilla cream, and she switched to milk. She forgot, I didn’t. 

It is important to have good relationships with others while here on Earth. Good relationships allow us to build each other up, support one another, help those in need, love when loving is hard, and forgive when it’s too hard even to think about forgiving. Healthy, strong relationships allow us to share Christ. One of the jobs God gave us to do here on Earth is to love. We are to love Him first and others next. 

Somehow, as humans, we have taken that assignment and butchered it by trying to gain materialistic items we’re never going to take with us. We get on the hampster wheel of “life” and get so caught up in it that we lose sight of the present and the things that should matter. I’m talking about myself here. Death has reminded me that empty I came into this world, and empty I shall leave. I’m not taking anything here with me. All the trinkets, the material things, everything I have worked so hard for here are staying here. The only thing I can take with me is you; the only thing you can take with you is someone else. 

Death has also reminded me of how bad it stings when it happens and why it has to happen. Back in the summer, I got stung two separate times. It has been a long time since a bee sting, and I had forgotten how bad it hurt. In 1 Corinthians 15:55, Paul speaks about the sting of death being sin. Sometimes, I wish I could travel way back in time and knock that fruit right out of Eve’s hand. It’s hard to watch those we love go through painful things, and we can’t help. I bet it was painful for God to watch His son go through what He did for someone like me. He could have changed the outcome many times, but He chose not to because He loved me, too. God loves me, and He loves you. And because of God’s sacrifice, death no longer can steal us or the ones we love… who know God.

The key to beating the sting of death is that we have to accept God as our Savior. We have to accept that Jesus died, was buried, and rose after three days. If we believe in Him, we are no longer dead, and we get a relationship with God that will change us forever. 

I want to be more Christ-like, and I want others to know about God. I want to tell as many people as I can about God so that when they face death, or they have a loved one facing death, they will know without a doubt that it is not the last time they will see them. I know without a doubt that my mother-in-law is with Jesus. And, like my own mother and dad, I will see them all again. One of the preachers at the funeral said the saddest thing as a preacher is to officiate someone’s funeral and not fully know if that person knew Jesus. Please tell those you love about God. Please make sure you will see them in eternity with Jesus. 

When I perish, I never want anyone to question whether I knew God or not. Join me.